That sums it up. I know I am not the first with that opinion, but that is a true statement.
I had a bag full of clothes for the salvation army sitting next to my door for me to grab on my way out. On my way out, I noticed my daughters cat sitting on it. I kicked it off the bag and in the cats place was now a small puddle of piss.
This cat has a box that is maintained that it can go in, however, it thinks it needs to mark its territory on a bag of perfectly good clothes that are no longer staying in the house. It has no business trying to let the world know that that bag is hers.
Right now, there are probably cats at the land fill marking their territory all over the place and are going to come across this bag. When one of the does, I am sure it will laugh and go to the water cooler where all the other dumbass cats hang out and talk about a stupid bag that some dumbass cat pissed on.
Stupid cats.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Thursday, February 15, 2007
How to catch a flight....
In the business I am in, I do some traveling. So In my blogging days to come, I'll share some of my traveling stories. Here is a more recent one...
A few weeks ago, I was in Pheonix and I stayed the weekend to visit a couple of my brothers that live there. My flight back home left at 5:13pm sunday night. I was in Suprise, which is about an hour from the airport. I left there at about 3:15. that gives me an hour to the airport and an hour there before my flight. I should be good.
I get on the freeway and as I am getting closer to the city, I decide I better exit somewhere and get gas in my rental car. As I think this, I pass an exit where I see a gas station. No problem, I'll catch one at the next exit or the one after. I have only been driving for about 20 mins or so.
As I come up to the next exit, I see there are still a couple more exits coming soon and I may still be a ways our from the airport, so I keep going. I pass like 2 more exits where I see gas stations at both. Then decide I will get off at the next one. By this time, it is 3:45. I get off and pull into the Circle K to get gas. The only station there that I see near the exit. As I get out, the lady cleaning the trash can out there tells me they are closed! 'Closed?' Great!
I go back the other way across the freeway (north) to get a station there. Nothing. Nothing for a mile! I turn around and hurry back to the freeway. I get on and figure the next exit should have one. I was wrong. I drive around and now it is 3:55 and I get back on the freeway and figure I may have to go past the airport to find something. Finally, I get to University Ave. There has to be something here. I go North and drive and drive, I figure a main road like that HAS to have a station on it eventually. FINALLY a Chevron! I look at my watch and it is 4. I hurry and pump the gas and get back to the freeway. I'm flying like the wind! To the rental garage, the on the rental bus.
4:15, my flight in one hour. I should be good. I still need to check in and go thru security. I know its not busy, (it never has been at this time in the past) so I fugure I'm ok.
The bus ride to the airport takes for EVER! We stop at every light, take every corner slower then walking speed and I thought I was going to strangle the driver. Maybe it was because I was in a hurry. I don't know. All I know is it took a long, long time.
4:25 I am at the delta counter and nobody in line. The place is a gost town and there are 4 agents at the desk. Good!
I pick the best looking one and tell her my name. She said I missed my flight. I laugh and said it's not until 5:13! She said right! 5:13 last FRIDAY! It will cost $112 to get me on the flight. I said I need to call my travel agent. She said she would save me a seat. (Just as nice as she is good looking) How about a window seat? She says 'how about a bulk head? You be lucky to even make it on the plan!'
4:35 I finally get an agent on the phone. Looks like they didn't switch it back after all the confusion of flying home Friday night or Sunday night she says. She'll go ahead and book and bill my ticket now. I hold. She comes back and says she can't because Delta's phone line is busy. I laugh. I said well the only thing you can do is keep trying...right!? She said...well, yeah. I suppose. I said I would hold until she got it.
4:45 she comes back and says she got it and now just has to type in the details. This takes nearly 10 mins. I go to the ticket counter while I am on the phone and tell the cute girl my agent is almost done. She said she better hurry. 5 mins and she won't be able to get me on the flight. I tell the agent and she just finishes up and says the superviser needs to clear it then it should be done. How long? I say. She said 5 mins. I said, Make it 4! I tell the agent behind the desk and she says ok.
5:05 the agent prints off a ticket for me and says 'go to the gate and check in.' My ticket has not been cleared at this point, but the agent said if I don't leave now, I will never get thru security in time and will miss my flgiht. 'By the time you get to the gate the ticket will have gone thru'.
5:07 I get to security and am releaved to find nobody there except one couple. ISA decides they want to go thru my bag. SHIT! 5:12 they are done and I am running to my gate. Thank god it was only the second gate down the terminal. Another ghost town. Only the agent at the desk and the door is still open.
5:13 I give him my name and he checks the computer and I am good to go. WHEW!
I get in the plane and it is full. Now, to find my seat. 13A. A window seat! I owe the agent at the desk a kiss! How did she do that? I love her.
As I get settled in, 2 other people file in and it was another 5 mins before they closed the door! What a bunch of CRAP! If the plan is scheduled to leave at 5:13, it should leave at 5:13! However, I have flown enough to know that this never happens. No problem. All good and now I'm on my way home. (and yes - I could have waited until 7 for the next flight....but 2 hours in the airport sucks!)
A few weeks ago, I was in Pheonix and I stayed the weekend to visit a couple of my brothers that live there. My flight back home left at 5:13pm sunday night. I was in Suprise, which is about an hour from the airport. I left there at about 3:15. that gives me an hour to the airport and an hour there before my flight. I should be good.
I get on the freeway and as I am getting closer to the city, I decide I better exit somewhere and get gas in my rental car. As I think this, I pass an exit where I see a gas station. No problem, I'll catch one at the next exit or the one after. I have only been driving for about 20 mins or so.
As I come up to the next exit, I see there are still a couple more exits coming soon and I may still be a ways our from the airport, so I keep going. I pass like 2 more exits where I see gas stations at both. Then decide I will get off at the next one. By this time, it is 3:45. I get off and pull into the Circle K to get gas. The only station there that I see near the exit. As I get out, the lady cleaning the trash can out there tells me they are closed! 'Closed?' Great!
I go back the other way across the freeway (north) to get a station there. Nothing. Nothing for a mile! I turn around and hurry back to the freeway. I get on and figure the next exit should have one. I was wrong. I drive around and now it is 3:55 and I get back on the freeway and figure I may have to go past the airport to find something. Finally, I get to University Ave. There has to be something here. I go North and drive and drive, I figure a main road like that HAS to have a station on it eventually. FINALLY a Chevron! I look at my watch and it is 4. I hurry and pump the gas and get back to the freeway. I'm flying like the wind! To the rental garage, the on the rental bus.
4:15, my flight in one hour. I should be good. I still need to check in and go thru security. I know its not busy, (it never has been at this time in the past) so I fugure I'm ok.
The bus ride to the airport takes for EVER! We stop at every light, take every corner slower then walking speed and I thought I was going to strangle the driver. Maybe it was because I was in a hurry. I don't know. All I know is it took a long, long time.
4:25 I am at the delta counter and nobody in line. The place is a gost town and there are 4 agents at the desk. Good!
I pick the best looking one and tell her my name. She said I missed my flight. I laugh and said it's not until 5:13! She said right! 5:13 last FRIDAY! It will cost $112 to get me on the flight. I said I need to call my travel agent. She said she would save me a seat. (Just as nice as she is good looking) How about a window seat? She says 'how about a bulk head? You be lucky to even make it on the plan!'
4:35 I finally get an agent on the phone. Looks like they didn't switch it back after all the confusion of flying home Friday night or Sunday night she says. She'll go ahead and book and bill my ticket now. I hold. She comes back and says she can't because Delta's phone line is busy. I laugh. I said well the only thing you can do is keep trying...right!? She said...well, yeah. I suppose. I said I would hold until she got it.
4:45 she comes back and says she got it and now just has to type in the details. This takes nearly 10 mins. I go to the ticket counter while I am on the phone and tell the cute girl my agent is almost done. She said she better hurry. 5 mins and she won't be able to get me on the flight. I tell the agent and she just finishes up and says the superviser needs to clear it then it should be done. How long? I say. She said 5 mins. I said, Make it 4! I tell the agent behind the desk and she says ok.
5:05 the agent prints off a ticket for me and says 'go to the gate and check in.' My ticket has not been cleared at this point, but the agent said if I don't leave now, I will never get thru security in time and will miss my flgiht. 'By the time you get to the gate the ticket will have gone thru'.
5:07 I get to security and am releaved to find nobody there except one couple. ISA decides they want to go thru my bag. SHIT! 5:12 they are done and I am running to my gate. Thank god it was only the second gate down the terminal. Another ghost town. Only the agent at the desk and the door is still open.
5:13 I give him my name and he checks the computer and I am good to go. WHEW!
I get in the plane and it is full. Now, to find my seat. 13A. A window seat! I owe the agent at the desk a kiss! How did she do that? I love her.
As I get settled in, 2 other people file in and it was another 5 mins before they closed the door! What a bunch of CRAP! If the plan is scheduled to leave at 5:13, it should leave at 5:13! However, I have flown enough to know that this never happens. No problem. All good and now I'm on my way home. (and yes - I could have waited until 7 for the next flight....but 2 hours in the airport sucks!)
Saturday, February 10, 2007
‘I don’t want to get a ticket!’
I took my 15 yr old daughter (Rhae) out driving today so she could practice parallel parking for her drivers test. I learned that patients is the key. I should have learned this teaching my other older daughter, 19 now, as she has since been in several wrecks and has surrendered her license back to the state and cannot drive now. Not sure if that was my fault for not teaching as well as I should have or hers for not paying attention to on-coming vehicles as she is making a left turn.
As I digress…
Rhae is turning out to be a good driver. She has one fault that may prevent her from ever driving. That is, she cannot multi-task. I love Rhae to death, however she is a blonde. At least she dyes her hair blonde, and I think subconsciously she thinks she is, therefore she acts like one. What ever the case, she cannot look in her mirrors without her hands following her eyes. She also cannot look down the road and drive at the same time. Getting the ‘Big’ picture is a Big problem for her. She can only process one thing at a time. The car in front of her….then the lines on the road to make sure she is in between them….then her speed. By this time, the car in front of her as nearly stopped and we are still traveling at 40 mph. This creates a slight panic in my mind, and as calm as I can muster, as to not scare her and make her panic, I say STOOOOOP! She slams the brakes, I look behind us and luckily that guy had the smarts to look at the car in front of us and was just going to sit back and watch an accident unfold in front of him.
After cleaning my shorts, I ask if she is ok. She said I scared her, and I said, ‘good, now you know how I felt when I seen the decal sticker on their license plate getting larger’. ‘Pay attention!’ ‘I was!’ she says. ‘then why did you leave a 6 foot skid mark on the ground back there?’ ‘Because I was checking my speed’ she says. ‘I don’t want to get a ticket!’ I laugh. It’s all I could do at this point.
After practicing some parallel parking and driving backwards, we head home with no issues after that. She’s got turning down, and braking. Still a little more to work on. I am sure she will do good.
As I digress…
Rhae is turning out to be a good driver. She has one fault that may prevent her from ever driving. That is, she cannot multi-task. I love Rhae to death, however she is a blonde. At least she dyes her hair blonde, and I think subconsciously she thinks she is, therefore she acts like one. What ever the case, she cannot look in her mirrors without her hands following her eyes. She also cannot look down the road and drive at the same time. Getting the ‘Big’ picture is a Big problem for her. She can only process one thing at a time. The car in front of her….then the lines on the road to make sure she is in between them….then her speed. By this time, the car in front of her as nearly stopped and we are still traveling at 40 mph. This creates a slight panic in my mind, and as calm as I can muster, as to not scare her and make her panic, I say STOOOOOP! She slams the brakes, I look behind us and luckily that guy had the smarts to look at the car in front of us and was just going to sit back and watch an accident unfold in front of him.
After cleaning my shorts, I ask if she is ok. She said I scared her, and I said, ‘good, now you know how I felt when I seen the decal sticker on their license plate getting larger’. ‘Pay attention!’ ‘I was!’ she says. ‘then why did you leave a 6 foot skid mark on the ground back there?’ ‘Because I was checking my speed’ she says. ‘I don’t want to get a ticket!’ I laugh. It’s all I could do at this point.
After practicing some parallel parking and driving backwards, we head home with no issues after that. She’s got turning down, and braking. Still a little more to work on. I am sure she will do good.
Friday, February 9, 2007
The Dentist.
The Dentist.
As the great Jerry Seinfeld was once accused of being, I am an Anti-Dentite. I can't stand the dentist. Not him personally, just the whole poking, drilling, digging, kicking and screaming that goes on while I am there. And after all that, he wants me to open my mouth to take a look at my teeth. (not sure what that means, but I hear people say it and i thought it would be funny here. On we go....) My experience at the dentist yesterday was not so bad. But watching my 13 year old son was. That needle he used was quite large and if he hadn't numbed up the area first, I'm sure my son would still be crying now. All the poking and injecting that was done, my sons face was numb for 6 hours. Then he started in with the drilling. Zzzzz, Zzzzzz. This went on for about 5 mins. Then..."Wow! This cavity is deeper then I thought!" Zzzz, Zzzzzzzzz,. (mixed with grinding and the sound of the drill slowing down at the same time) Much like you see on Monster Garage when somebody is using a grinder on a piece of steel that needs to be broke in two, but the piece of steel is not going to give up very easlily. After he nearly 20 mins. he finishes up the 2 teeth that needed repairs, he says, "OK Kid, see you in a couple of days to finish up those other 3 teeth on the other side of your mouth." My son laughed and said - "ya - right."
Next was my turn. After seeing what happend to him, I knew my own fate. I wanted it to be as quick as possible, so I lay there like a corpse with my head cocked to the side, eyes shut tight, and mouth wide open for his easy access to repair the decreped i'll fated teeth that lie in state in my mouth. First the deadining swabs. (best thing since sliced bread). Then, the 4 ft. long needle. Oh the poking and digging....I can feel it sliding in and out of my cheek, but it didn't hurt. I wanted to feel the outside of my cheek to make sure it wasn't going out the side, but I know the deadining swaps hadn't touched my fingers, so it would have hurt. "lets give that a min. to set in" he says. "Great Idea!" (my last clear words for nearly 6 hours).
Zzzzzz, Zzzzzzzzzzz!!! Uh-oh...here'comes! "ok - open wide and turn your head this way.... farther....farther" God! I would have said get on the other side of me, but I think in my position, you just do what the dentist says. Best if he's as comfortable as possible I think. The last thing I remember is thinking the drill had a dull end on it and it seemed like it was taking for ever. Next thing I know, he pats me on the shoulder and said I did good, and actually thanked me for laying so still. I felt like I had no choice. He's the one with the sharp tools in his hands, right!?
After I left, I noticed that I was having a hard time blinking my right eye. It was numb too! My eye was numb! I couldn't feel it. He really juiced me up good. I got back to work and put my headphones in to jamb out and I couldn't tell if my right earphone was in or not. My ear was numb! The inside of my ear was actually numb too! He really did juice me up good. It was nearly a distinctive line down the center of my head. Left side, normal, right side, no feeling what-so-ever! Now, I have had dental work done before, but never been numbed up like that. I was thanking my dentist all day for making sure I wasn't going to feel anything he was doing to me.
Nearly 6 hours later, my numbness was wearing off (finally), and I could start feeling the pain on the inside of my cheek where he used it as a pin cushin. Holy crap it hurt. I started thinking that there has got to be a way we all could get our dentists back for putting us thru that kind of pain, when I realized I probably already did. Before I went to my appointment, which was at 12 noon, I thought I had better get something to eat before I go. So, I go to Subway and order my usual.
Foot long BMT on wheat with Pepper Jack cheese, and 'the Works'. (lettuce, tomato, pickels, olives, cucumbers, and ONIONS) hahahaha!
Wait a minute....thats probably why my mouth hurts so bad. Crap! I obviously was not his first patient.
As the great Jerry Seinfeld was once accused of being, I am an Anti-Dentite. I can't stand the dentist. Not him personally, just the whole poking, drilling, digging, kicking and screaming that goes on while I am there. And after all that, he wants me to open my mouth to take a look at my teeth. (not sure what that means, but I hear people say it and i thought it would be funny here. On we go....) My experience at the dentist yesterday was not so bad. But watching my 13 year old son was. That needle he used was quite large and if he hadn't numbed up the area first, I'm sure my son would still be crying now. All the poking and injecting that was done, my sons face was numb for 6 hours. Then he started in with the drilling. Zzzzz, Zzzzzz. This went on for about 5 mins. Then..."Wow! This cavity is deeper then I thought!" Zzzz, Zzzzzzzzz,. (mixed with grinding and the sound of the drill slowing down at the same time) Much like you see on Monster Garage when somebody is using a grinder on a piece of steel that needs to be broke in two, but the piece of steel is not going to give up very easlily. After he nearly 20 mins. he finishes up the 2 teeth that needed repairs, he says, "OK Kid, see you in a couple of days to finish up those other 3 teeth on the other side of your mouth." My son laughed and said - "ya - right."
Next was my turn. After seeing what happend to him, I knew my own fate. I wanted it to be as quick as possible, so I lay there like a corpse with my head cocked to the side, eyes shut tight, and mouth wide open for his easy access to repair the decreped i'll fated teeth that lie in state in my mouth. First the deadining swabs. (best thing since sliced bread). Then, the 4 ft. long needle. Oh the poking and digging....I can feel it sliding in and out of my cheek, but it didn't hurt. I wanted to feel the outside of my cheek to make sure it wasn't going out the side, but I know the deadining swaps hadn't touched my fingers, so it would have hurt. "lets give that a min. to set in" he says. "Great Idea!" (my last clear words for nearly 6 hours).
Zzzzzz, Zzzzzzzzzzz!!! Uh-oh...here'comes! "ok - open wide and turn your head this way.... farther....farther" God! I would have said get on the other side of me, but I think in my position, you just do what the dentist says. Best if he's as comfortable as possible I think. The last thing I remember is thinking the drill had a dull end on it and it seemed like it was taking for ever. Next thing I know, he pats me on the shoulder and said I did good, and actually thanked me for laying so still. I felt like I had no choice. He's the one with the sharp tools in his hands, right!?
After I left, I noticed that I was having a hard time blinking my right eye. It was numb too! My eye was numb! I couldn't feel it. He really juiced me up good. I got back to work and put my headphones in to jamb out and I couldn't tell if my right earphone was in or not. My ear was numb! The inside of my ear was actually numb too! He really did juice me up good. It was nearly a distinctive line down the center of my head. Left side, normal, right side, no feeling what-so-ever! Now, I have had dental work done before, but never been numbed up like that. I was thanking my dentist all day for making sure I wasn't going to feel anything he was doing to me.
Nearly 6 hours later, my numbness was wearing off (finally), and I could start feeling the pain on the inside of my cheek where he used it as a pin cushin. Holy crap it hurt. I started thinking that there has got to be a way we all could get our dentists back for putting us thru that kind of pain, when I realized I probably already did. Before I went to my appointment, which was at 12 noon, I thought I had better get something to eat before I go. So, I go to Subway and order my usual.
Foot long BMT on wheat with Pepper Jack cheese, and 'the Works'. (lettuce, tomato, pickels, olives, cucumbers, and ONIONS) hahahaha!
Wait a minute....thats probably why my mouth hurts so bad. Crap! I obviously was not his first patient.
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